Friday, September 23, 2011

Pluck, Shave and Dye It!

Being a woman is hard stuff. Nothing to mess around with, that’s for sure. I had a horrific incident that changed my life as a woman, probably forever. I discovered, I have a mustache… And not the cool kind…
In addition to my new stache, I have also battled a chin hair for quite some time. As a result of not listening to my mother as a child, (take heed children) I have to pluck an extremely long hair directly from my chin on a bi-weekly basis. When I was younger, I was standing in a rocking chair and refused my mother’s advice to get down… I of course fell and busted my chin wide open… And apparently hair grows from scars… And if that’s a myth or totally untrue, don’t tell me. I feel better having something to blame it on. K? K!
Granted, I’m blonde and so is the stache… But it’s there nonetheless and in the wrong lighting, this can be a disaster. Men are so lucky. They grow wild hair all over the place and display it proudly. Some more than they ought to. Women, we have to pay to have it removed and go to extreme lengths to keep it hidden from the public . We have to shave, pluck and dye everything on our bodies and it’s an exhausting and painful routine that goes completely unnoticed. Men have no idea the depths and efforts that go behind our looks. However if a man did take notice to my stache or the absence of my stache, I would likely be offended… So they really can’t win. Sorry guys.
I was watching Bridesmaids last night and there was a part about the girls bleaching something, and it was not their hair. I wasn’t necessarily shocked by it because I’ve been to a day spa and read the thru the menu of treatments available. But I was just reminded of the length we go to look and feel good about ourselves. We dread our yearly interrogation meeting with the gynecologist, yet for beauty sake, we willingly get on all fours and say, BLEACH IT!  We hate getting blood drawn or shots, but we pluck hairs from our face (and sometimes chin) with roots the size of golf balls without hesitation.  We approach mammograms with tremendous trepidation, but we will drop trou and allow a total stranger to airbrush a fake tan on our bodies.
Boys wait impatiently for the day to see their first chin hair, women await impatiently armed with tweezers. Boys anxiously await the moment to buy and use a razor. Women begin to buy razors in bulk.
I know all women are different and do different things to boost their self esteem and some go further than others. Me personally, I have an appointment to take care of this mustache later today.
This post is somewhat meaningless… What crazy lengths have you gone to beautify yourself?
 - - - - - - COOL Mustache




- - - - - NOT COOL Mustache