Monday, February 27, 2012

THEY were right

Well I assume they are right, as they usually are. Whoever they are I’m so glad they were right and I’m now a believer of them. People always say when you aren’t looking for someone, that’s when someone finds you, which is exactly what happened. I’m going to withhold a few details of The Boy for now but I give him all the credit for my recent child like behavior. I have doodled his name on my binder and I gush, blush and mush over him frequently.

I had no intention on meeting someone when and where I did. It happened almost to the minute when I decided that I was perfectly content not meeting anyone then BOOM! My previous relationship or whatever was enough experience for me to jump off the dating Ferris wheel for a while and join the witness protection program. The Boy has removed a veil from my eyes that I never knew was there and I see things differently and I feel them differently.

Many of my friends and readers are quite interested in my love life (or lack thereof) and how it’s progressing and/or digressing. To those keeping up, and for those just tuning in, things are great fantastic!  I will continue to elaborate more as this story develops.

Like most of my custodial weekends, I had 2 birthday parties and a play date. And by play date, I mean a chance for me and a friend to drink wine and gossip while the kids play quietly (insert sarcasm) amongst themselves. Both children were on their best behavior for the majority of the weekend and I have determined that their behavior is the common denominator to my happiness. (And they know it.) One of the parties was at a Chucky Cheese knock off which I like to refer to as over-stimulation station. What kid palace would be complete without a urinal jungle gym for the kids to crawl on and collect germs like a lent trap? Ick. And of course the tickets…the D&*%%& tickets!!! I think it would have been easier to explain the Bermuda Triangle to Kylee than it was to explain that you can’t buy anything for 500 tickets when you only have 92!  I showed Kylee the shelf she was allowed to pick from to cash in her tickets and for the love of gawd she did not understand why I was being so heartless. Of course it’s my lifelong dream to prevent her from owning a piggy bank from Peter Piper Pizza. Or at least in her head that’s how it went down. I was ready to slip the 15 year old behind the counter a $20 and call it a day except the little twerp next to me seemed suspicious so I aborted the mission. However I just found a princess piggy bank at Target WITH a crown for $14.99 so there is room from redemption yet!

Mom -1 :  Peter Piper Pizza - 0

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Love Life


I’ve been thinking about life a lot lately. (wow that’s a mouth full) (That’s what she said) OK I’m getting off track.

I’m so thankful for music. I have heard so many songs that relate directly to my current life, stuff. And it’s comforting. Maybe that’s how music has always been except now I am actually listening to it. I think Adele has a spy camera in my purse and The Civil Wars has been reading my diary. It’s frightening how perfectly the lyrics mirror my emotions and thoughts. One Republic has a song called Good Life and it’s so simple, yet extremely 
eye opening for me. The course is: 

                  Oh this has gotta be the good life 
                                                          This has gotta be the good life  
                                                          This could really be a good life, good life

As simple as it sounds, I can’t say that I have been approaching life as a gift that I can mold into anything I decide I want it to be. This could really be a good, good life. This optimistic statement is both exciting and scary to me at the same time. Exciting because each new day holds new possibilities and opportunities. Scary, because each new day might not have anything new worth keeping.

I’m guilty of making choices and decisions (big and small) for myself that make almost everyone around me comfortable and happy, all the while neglecting ME in the process. 

Life is an ongoing lesson with ever changing classrooms and rotating teachers. We pull things that we need from certain people at certain times in our lives. Some of those people are like permanent markers and their marks never leave us. Some are pens whose marks are easily washed away. Then there are the pencils who try really hard to leave a mark on your life, but rarely show up and are effortlessly erased.

Life excites me, now. I want to live my life, not just survive it. I want to meet people who bring enrichment to my existence. I want to strengthen the relationships that already do, I want to remove those who don’t.
I haven’t quite graduated from the school of Life yet but I am learning a lot of things along the way. I am hopeful I will continue to learn a lot more. 

For those keeping track, let’s review:

I’ve learned that you can make plans for your life, but you can’t prepare for the unplanned.

I’ve learned that pain isn’t as painful when you don’t resist it.

I’ve learned that time flies and moments turn into memories. So relish in the moments and cherish the memories

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. 

I've learned that whenever I decide something with a pure heart, I usually make the right decision.

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with catcher's mitts on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back.

I’ve learned that it’s easy to make good friends when you surround yourself with good people.

I’ve learned that a hot bath and glass of wine can either be really relaxing or really depressing…(Depending on your hormonal state of mind.)

I’ve learned that love is nothing like a romantic comedy.

I’ve learned that guys aren’t lining up like my dad said they would, and that’s okay.

I’ve learned that being alone and being lonely are not the same thing.

I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life."

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel

I’ve learned that my happiness cannot be created by trying to create other people's happiness for them.

I’ve learned that it’s okay to be selfish sometimes.

I’ve learned it’s impossible to please everyone

I’ve learned that it’s okay to make the first step towards something you want.

I’ve learned about risk.

I’ve learned about reward.

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Living Social, Groupons and more, OH MY!

Do you receive those daily offers from Groupon, Living Social, Amazon Local Deals, or any other coupon websites? If so there’s a good chance you are questioning the value of your existence and evaluating where you rank on the fun factor scale of life. Or is that just me? Each day I check my email and I have about 3 different deals to choose from. They are generally always too expensive for the budget I have set aside for my hot stone massages, (insert disgruntled sarcasm because I clearly have no budget for massages of ANY kind) or I just can’t seem to find the extra hours in my week to take that romantic trip for two… They need to send a Groupon deal for some actual romance, I would buy that, and then I might consider the romantic getaway… But I’m clearly not going to purchase a romantic getaway minus the romance. Know your audience Groupon!
Are there really people who are taking weekend trips to rock climb, bungee jump, zip line through the rain forest and take Chisholm Trail rides? If so, I just have a few questions.  Who are these people? Do they work full time? Do they have children? Do they have extracurricular commitments such as Pinterest? And if so, how do they do manage to be so awesome and when and where can we meet?
Not everyone is actually buying these outlandish and extravagant packages… Are they? Especially the coupons on how to dance like a hooker on a pole or a photo shoot in your panties ½ off… (the price)… Are there really women buying these things? Wowzer!
I am hopeful that one day the stars will align perfectly and I will actually get some use out of these special offers. Until then these emails typically find themselves in my Deleted Items folder as I continue to live vicariously through the ads.

Friday, February 3, 2012


By writing this blog I understand my life is an open book, for lack of a better phrase. My intentions are never not to purposely hurt someone’s feelings. With that being said, this was too good not to share.
I can’t tell you the last time I felt so bewildered and frankly, applaud. I have encountered plenty of circumstances that left me feeling, angry, worthless, defeated, confused and lost. But it’s been a good minute since I last felt this way.
Without divulging more information than needed, let me set the scene. I had to be somewhere at 7pm one evening. I stopped to get my dinner before, arrived at my thing and sat down to eat it. I was accompanied by a friend who also arrived early. This friend’s child (about 4 or 5) joined us. The child then reached over to my food, and took my chips. Didn’t ask, didn’t hesitate and took the entire bag of chips. Then she continued to pick up the few chips I had poured out next to my sandwich and placed them back in the bag… Which she had confiscated into her own possession at this point. I waited for the natural reaction of the mother to intercede and enforce her child’s manners to be utilized … But that never happen. She just laughed it off and said, “Well someone’s hungry, haha!” and continued to allow part of my dinner to be devoured right in front of me. I was, appalled.
Let me be clear, I was not upset that my chips had been stolen. It was the lack of corrective action that didn’t happen. I wasn’t offered a new bag from the vending machine, I wasn’t apologized to or anything. It was as if I should have known better or something.
I was also recently at a clothing store just browsing… I had a few items I wanted to try on.  I had noticed another shopper had her daughter with her who was about 4 or 5 as well. She had been running loose through the store and getting too far out of the mother’s sight, in my opinion. She was hiding under the racks, playing with the clothes and doing everything except listing to her mother’s instructions to COME HERE, STOP THAT, AND QUIT! She ran in front of me once and I almost tripped on her. I got to the dressing rooms and saw the little girl peeking her head into all the rooms…. (appalled) She had to move out of the way so the clerk could unlock a door for me. I went in, shut the door and waited for her little head to pop under and sneak a peek at my under. It was inevitable, she did and I gave her the look and she went away. When I came out of the room the mom apologized to me. I felt her pain. I can relate to her, but come on already!
As a mother we all have contingency plans in our mind of how we would handle situations as they unfold before us.  I’ve been the embarrassed mom before and I can feel the judgmental Janice eyes rolled behind my back as we slump out in shame. I am by no means perfect. So I appreciate that we are not all the same in our parenting styles and methods and that is perfectly acceptable, until my chips are taken from me or I’m the star of a peep show! According to all the books no one knows the right way to do this, including myself. There might not be a right or wrong way. But there must be a way to coexist with other parents when their style doesn’t mirror ours.
When all else fails, get a sitter and a box of wine.

No creative title....

My girlfriend signed me up for this Mud Run death race thingy in April. I toyed around with a few reasons as to why I couldn’t participate. Nothing crazy, just the typical excuses; I’m too busy to train, I can’t afford it, I have to water the lawn, I’m allergic to mud, etc. But ultimately when she paid for my registration fee I was officially out of logical excuses not to do it and no one wants to say out loud that they’re just too lazy to get in shape. Instead, I went out and got a Jillian Michaels DVD to use at home and started running jogging on the side. I must say, I’ve never been a natural runner. I was never a fan of gasping for breath, burning throat, sore feet or that pain in your side that resembles a pair of scissors being jabbed in and out with relentless force. I wish I was one of those chicks whose idea of stress therapy involved a pair of Asics and a bottle of Figi water. My stress therapy is more likely to involve a pair of peep toe shoes and box of wine. To each his own.  
Logan has begun to form an opinion so the dynamics of our nightly routine have changed slightly. Kylee and Logan are constantly going to the mattresses about which show is going to be watched first. Dino Dan or Max and Ruby? Logan is no longer passive about letting his sitter control the…. everything. He is very particular about having and doing whatever Kylee has or is doing. If she has a granola bar, he has to have a granola bar. If she feeds their fish, he feeds their fish. He she helps g me prepare dinner, he has to help me prepare dinner. It stinks because I am not an equal opportunity mother. I have neither the time nor patience to instill equality to my home. Please drop your comments/complaints in the comment box on your way out.
I am happy to report that there hasn’t been much activity from the X-man lately. We hardly speak and when we do it is the bare minimum regarding the kids. We have perfected our text communication to a few short words. Yes, no, okay, maybe. His relationship to Hannah Montana inevitably didn’t work. (tears of joy) Ironically I haven’t seen mascara on Kylee since her predicted departure.
February is going to keep us very busy. Multiple baby showers and birthday parties to attend. So let’s pop a 5 hour energy and get this month started shall we?!