Friday, February 3, 2012

Appalled

By writing this blog I understand my life is an open book, for lack of a better phrase. My intentions are never not to purposely hurt someone’s feelings. With that being said, this was too good not to share.
I can’t tell you the last time I felt so bewildered and frankly, applaud. I have encountered plenty of circumstances that left me feeling, angry, worthless, defeated, confused and lost. But it’s been a good minute since I last felt this way.
Without divulging more information than needed, let me set the scene. I had to be somewhere at 7pm one evening. I stopped to get my dinner before, arrived at my thing and sat down to eat it. I was accompanied by a friend who also arrived early. This friend’s child (about 4 or 5) joined us. The child then reached over to my food, and took my chips. Didn’t ask, didn’t hesitate and took the entire bag of chips. Then she continued to pick up the few chips I had poured out next to my sandwich and placed them back in the bag… Which she had confiscated into her own possession at this point. I waited for the natural reaction of the mother to intercede and enforce her child’s manners to be utilized … But that never happen. She just laughed it off and said, “Well someone’s hungry, haha!” and continued to allow part of my dinner to be devoured right in front of me. I was, appalled.
Let me be clear, I was not upset that my chips had been stolen. It was the lack of corrective action that didn’t happen. I wasn’t offered a new bag from the vending machine, I wasn’t apologized to or anything. It was as if I should have known better or something.
I was also recently at a clothing store just browsing… I had a few items I wanted to try on.  I had noticed another shopper had her daughter with her who was about 4 or 5 as well. She had been running loose through the store and getting too far out of the mother’s sight, in my opinion. She was hiding under the racks, playing with the clothes and doing everything except listing to her mother’s instructions to COME HERE, STOP THAT, AND QUIT! She ran in front of me once and I almost tripped on her. I got to the dressing rooms and saw the little girl peeking her head into all the rooms…. (appalled) She had to move out of the way so the clerk could unlock a door for me. I went in, shut the door and waited for her little head to pop under and sneak a peek at my under. It was inevitable, she did and I gave her the look and she went away. When I came out of the room the mom apologized to me. I felt her pain. I can relate to her, but come on already!
As a mother we all have contingency plans in our mind of how we would handle situations as they unfold before us.  I’ve been the embarrassed mom before and I can feel the judgmental Janice eyes rolled behind my back as we slump out in shame. I am by no means perfect. So I appreciate that we are not all the same in our parenting styles and methods and that is perfectly acceptable, until my chips are taken from me or I’m the star of a peep show! According to all the books no one knows the right way to do this, including myself. There might not be a right or wrong way. But there must be a way to coexist with other parents when their style doesn’t mirror ours.
When all else fails, get a sitter and a box of wine.