Tuesday, July 17, 2012

It's been two weeks, but here's the recap!

I’m back from church camp!!! It was an amazing experience and blessing to be there.  I know God’s calling on my life has to do with teenagers in some way. I think it’s a field that is still in the tweeking process. Or maybe I’m the one still in the tweeking process.  The last few years I have had the chance to watch our students grow, change, endure, fail, succeed and overcome. I didn’t grow up in church so I never attended camp as a student and this was my first time as a counselor. I had absolutely NO idea what to expect or how to prepare myself. I certainly didn’t know I was supposed to bring a blow dryer or curling iron to camp. (Note to self – bring beauty products next time) No joke.

A group picture of the girls @ camp

Students worshipping

Being a counselor at camp is much like being a substitute mom or the mother of a newborn. Hear me out… There was little to no sleep available and the sleep you did actually get was very poor in quality. There was always a need to be met (not your needs). You never sit down. Ever. You’re always waiting on someone to find their shoes. Your showers are rushed and also poor in quality. The meals were questionable and again, poor in quality.  It’s a sufficient comparison in my opinion. 

I left camp with an emotional/spiritual knot in my heart. It blessed me to be used as a vessel for God to communicate to the students. But it overwhelmed my spirit to see so many young people going to war prematurely over things that I didn’t know existed. So many of them unpacked their junk at the altar and I can only pray that it stays there.

While I was frolicking around at camp, the kids spent the week with their dad. To say I missed them would be the understatement of the year. Part of me ached all week as more hours passed that I didn’t get to talk to them, see them, or hear them laugh, cry, fight or whine. But they were kind enough to reserve a little bit of that for me once I picked them up.

Things are super great with The Boy. Loving him is easier than blinking and more natural than breathing. It’s definitely like nothing I have ever had before.  It’s deeper than a feeling and stronger than an emotion. It’s a blessing I can touch, feel and smell. It’s so real, that it’s unreal…. Yup, that makes sense.  

My dad is in town from Florida and will be meeting him for the first time. Typically this type of situation would create anxiety and momentary nervous fits for me. However, I feel really comfortable about it. I’m still getting to know his family too. We took my kids and his son to his dad’s house last week. I love getting little glimpses of what my future will be. His son is incredible, his folks are genuine people and his brother is good company.

For the first time in many, many years, I’m looking forward to what the future has for me instead of dreading it. My future has happiness, certainty, trust, love, joy, peace, laughs, and it’s all real. How cool is that?!  

The Boy helping Kylee with her goggles (awe, love)

Isaac and Logan developing a game plan 
The Boy and Isaac
The Boy with ALL the kids (love even more)